From the Reddit Thread:
Earned 181 upvotes. Was one of my favourite stories to write. At this point I had never seen a single episode of GoT.
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Once, in a world where winter was a big deal or something, and bad orcy things kept attacking, several factions fought over a throne....
"You'll never get away with this" the boy king squeeled, as the poison slowly stopped his heart.
She smirked over him, her job finally done, her families future on the throne secure. Which was good, as she had lots of sex with them for some reason. squish a sword poked out of her chest. "oh no" she cried, "I'm dead too".
"Haha!" cried the large man with the beard who could be one of several characters, "Now you too are dead, and the throne will be mine!"
A dragon flew in through the window. "I'll never let you rule my people" said the girl on the dragon, "Eat him!" and so the dragon ate the man. But then it got hungry and ate her too.
Into the room burst a huge man "I'll kill you!" he cried to the dragon. Grabbing it by the head he squished it until its head burst, splatting the Mountain, I think his name is, in the face. "Oh no, I got some dragon blood in my mouth, and it had incurable dying-illness!".
After mere moments, he choked to death.
"Hodor" said Hodor, hiding in the corner, before quietly hodoring himself to death....
All relevant characters are © George RR Martin, although I think he'd be pushed to find any likeness to his work.
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